“I have learned to kiss the wave that throws me against the Rock of Ages.” – Charles Spurgeon

These words, spoken by the British preacher Charles Spurgeon, encapsulate well the lessons I learned in my time in Greece this summer. I left on June 25th, filled with nervous excitement, with absolutely no idea what adventures laid before me. I returned yesterday, July 16th, and the past twenty three days have held adventure, growth, joy, tears, and so much of the nearness of Jesus.

I went to Greece to serve with a ministry called Hellenic Ministries – a ministry organization based out of Athens, Greece – specifically, to help with a summer project they run called Operation Joshua. Operation Joshua is a nine-day outreach in response to a great need in Greece. Unlike any other European country, the awareness and availability of Scripture in a language Greeks understand is scarce—the vast majority of the Greek population does not have access to the Bible in modern Greek. For two weeks each summer, believers from all over the world gather in Greece to distribute New Testaments in modern Greek. They walk from house to house, putting a Bible on every door. This summer, I got to serve on staff for OJ, assisting with photography and media as teams distributed the Living Word of God to every home.

The Greek name for Operation Joshua is ‘kathes piti,’ meaning ‘every home.’ This summer, we got over 100,000 homes closer to that goal as we placed a bible on the doorstep of every home in 860+ different villages in rural Greece. It was incredible watching as more families gained access to learning about Jesus for themselves and as the kingdom of God came just a little bit closer to earth. I will forever be thankful that I had the chance to be a part of such a powerful outreach.

While Operation Joshua was an incredible high point of my time in Greece, during the last five days of my trip, plans changed with the missions agency I was serving with in-country, and I was told to ‘figure something out.’ It sent me into a tailspin of fear and anxiety. I suddenly found myself responsible for finding housing and food and transportation on my own in a country where I know about fifteen words in the language. Never before in my life have I had to rely on the LORD to provide for my most basic needs in such a real way – but in His faithfulness He provided.

Of course He was faithful, right?

Right.

But goodness, my fearful heart surely did doubt. Isn’t it crazy how we doubt even though God proves His character to us time and time again? So many times, the LORD has demonstrated His goodness and kindness and faithfulness in real ways in my life. And it’s so easy to trust those things when I can stand on the shore and look out at the waves in the distance.

However, the thing I am learning is that this life is not about standing on the shore to ensure that the waves never reach your toes. It’s not about sitting out, standing back, and staying safe.

Not at all.

It’s about risk. It’s about jumping in head first. It’s about reckless abandonment. It’s about going further, diving deeper, and letting the waves come. Because, if there’s one thing I know, it’s that the waves will indeed come. That’s what happens when you say ‘yes’ to the call to follow Jesus. He beckons us out of our boats, says ‘come, follow Me,’ and calls us to listen to His voice above the roar of the waves.

 

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Shortly before dawn Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. “It’s a ghost,” they said, and cried out in fear. But Jesus immediately said to them: “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.” 

 “Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.”

“Come,” he said. Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!”

Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?”

And when they climbed into the boat, the wind died down. Then those who were in the boat worshiped him, saying, “Truly you are the Son of God.”

[Matthew 14:25-32] 

 

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One thing this trip taught me is how firm of a grip fear has on my life. I allow fear to dictate my choices, my emotions, and my trust in the LORD. When I left, I was fearful about being gone for such a long period of time. When I arrived, I became fearful of the implications of being alone without a team in a foreign country. When I became lonely, I feared that I was unloved by friends and by Jesus. When I had to take bold steps in finding ways to care for myself alone, I feared that God would not be near and He would abandon me.

SO. much. fear.

No matter the situation or where I turned, whenever ‘waves’ of struggle or difficulty or pain crashed into me, my first instinct was fear. Instead of putting my full trust into the One who walks on water, I feared He would let me drown. When Jesus said ‘you of little faith,’ He might as well have been talking directly to me.

I feared that, despite His track record of perfect faithfulness, that maybe this would be the time He lets me down, fails to be trustworthy, or stops loving me.

I was staring into the face of enormous, crashing waves, instead of staring into the face of my Jesus.

Many tears were shed. Many journal entries were written begging Jesus to help me trust Him. Many times I failed and fear won and faith lost.

But I’m learning.

Waves aren’t the end of the world when you know Who holds the world in His hands.

I’m so thankful I had the chance to go – to serve, to take pictures, to worship alongside believers from 26+ different countries. I’m thankful for the sweet moments, the joyful moments, the moments of laughter and fellowship and worship. Mornings at breakfast, days walking through mountains with arms full of Bibles to reach tiny village homes, afternoons on the beach with sweet new friends, and evenings spent worshipping outdoors for hours on end, listening to preaching and singing songs in both Greek and English. I’ll never forget those moments. And I’ll never stop being thankful for them.

But I am also so thankful for the hard moments. The ones filled with fear and tears. The ones where I didn’t know what to do next. The ones where I felt afraid and lonely and completely inadequate. I’m thankful for the waves. They’re refining me. They’re teaching me. I’ll never forget those moments either. And I’ll never stop being thankful for them.

This trip was beautiful. It was sweet. It was hard. It stretched me. It grew me. It sent a couple large waves my way that sent me crashing into the arms of Jesus. It taught me I’m not as good at trusting as I thought I was. But thats okay.

I’m learning.

I’m learning. How to better love. How to better lean in. And how incredibly much I have yet to learn.

I don’t want to run from waves anymore.

I want to chase Jesus into the deep and let the waves come.

He’ll be faithful. He’s the Rock of Ages.

Here’s to kissing waves.